Heartz**

2008-05-12T18:11:00.000-07:00

firstly, a million apologies for the abundance of the blog..i guess i have nothing much to talk about coz nothing interesting happened lately.. same old same old kan so i see theres no need for me to tell u people that i go to work n den go home and den sleep.. who would be interested? hehs.

firstly, a birthday shoutout to lianababybubbles** and Tqah! may both of u be blessed with all the happiness in the world. Lots of loves* n prayers for the both of u..

so far, im taking baby steps towards life.. been hard but slowly facing the fact of life. its scary how people think that ouh, u have lots of responsibilities now and that ure adult enough to think about the passage of life when the truth is that ure still figuring out life. im still searching for answers constantly and so far, alot had been unanswered.

and ouh, finally my graduation day is coming in about a few days time. like finally la kan. its sad that im leaving school but lets face it, i have to learn how to let go.

yea will be back blogging so look out for more updates kay...

Lots of love..

**Im sorry that this had to happen. im left with no choice

**MyHeartSays..

2008-03-04T19:22:00.000-08:00

been very tired for the last 2 weeks..
working has been fun, not like what i had expected it to be..
aftermath was tiring..
been dragging my feet home almost everyday..
but the meals was excellent..
*yes iman, ill tapau for u one of these days*

***************************************************************************
it feels like i can finally rest my head on something real

***************************************************************************

**
for all those feelings dat i felt, im sorry
but im happy that u understand my situation
im glad that im always reminded that ure always der
despite all that ive put u through
u stood there, always giving me your hand
so that i wont fall down again
you are always der when i turned around
and you smiled, making me smile as well
and den ill forget all the troubles
how can i not?
ure patient enough to walk by me
even though the past still haunts me wherever i go
even though the past stirred my feelings now
u were there
u were behind me
u were beside me
like always..

**
fall, with you i fall so fast <3

2008-02-26T20:06:00.000-08:00

How do I,
Get through one night without you?
If I had to live without you,
What kind of life would that be?

Oh, I...
I need you in my arms, need you to hold,
You're my world, my heart, my soul,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything good in my life,
And tell me now

How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Without you,
There'd be no sun in my sky,
There would be no love in my life,
There'd be no world left for me.

And I,
Baby I don't know what I would do,
I'd be lost if I lost you,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything real in my life,
And tell me now,

How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Please tell me baby,
How do I go on?
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything,
I need you with me,
Baby don't you know that you're everything,
Good in my life?
And tell me now,

How do I live without you,
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

How do I live without you?
How do I live without you baby?

********************************************************
cheesy eh the song but i like it aniway.. i like cheesy songs.. maybe cause i like cheese and im cheesy.. see wad i mean?

**
i dun think i can live without u either <3

2008-02-26T19:41:00.000-08:00

i think i lost track of ur age already la bradder.. haha kidding2...and i was joking too wen i asked u iszit ur birthday today or not? haha..ok ok i juz wanna wish u a very happy birthday and i dun wan anything but the best for you.. u have the telephone number in ur hand so just make that call okie =) and work hard, save up money and go get married...dun waste any more of your time at causeway point or bugis or marina square arcades and dun further waste animore time at the merlion or wathing every single fireworks display at esplanade.. hehe.. happy birthday once again shahrul and may you be blessed with all the happiness that u deserve ok.. and for that friendship, thank you =)
dearest Sue, happy birthday and may uacheive all ur dreams cause nobody deserve to be happy more den u.. for all the smiles, laughters and tears dat u shed for me, i love you.. for all the advises and ur constant reminder how life is, i love you.. for being a sister, friend and confidante, i love you.. for teaching me that beauty is in a person, i love you..i love you for everything that we ever go thru.. may this friendship stay sacred and may all the happiness be with you..

and when the world seem so lonely and cold

my handphone vibrates and i smiled =)

FromThisMomentOn**

2008-02-19T07:04:00.000-08:00

From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on

From this moment I have been blessed
I live only for your happiness
And for your love I'd give my last breath
From this moment on

I give my hand to you with all my heart
Can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment on

You're the reason I believe in love
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above
All we need is just the two of us
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment
I will love you as long as I live
From this moment on

**
some promises are meant to be broken =)
but not the promises in the lyrics above
this is a promise
my promise to you <3

**************************************************************

and today
like every other days
i see that light shining thru
and then a shadow
it walked slowly to me
i tried to figure out who
but the light was too bright
i shield my eyes with my hands
still wanting to see who
it kept coming closer
i could hear my heartbeat clearly
in between the silence
its louder as u came closer
i closed my eyes
and sumhow i could feel u breathe
in unison with mine
and den u touch my hands
and bring it to your lips
and u gave that little love
like how you do it every single time
it sends shivers
everywhere
u didnt let go of my hand after that
u squeezed it
to make sure i noe it wasnt juz a dream
i smiled
and finally i open my eyes
true enough
i see your face
tomorrow
and the day after
and all the days ahead of us
whenever i see you
i will get that feeling
over
and over
and over
and over again

**So it's not gonna be easy.

It's going to be really hard;

we're gonna have to work at this everyday,

but I want to do that because I want you.

I want all of you, forever, everyday.

You and me... everyday.

-Noah Calhoun from The Notebook

OhBeautiful**

2008-02-17T05:58:00.000-08:00

you've certainly found dat way..
to make me see fireworks..
and turn my knees weak like jelly..
and den, u smile and stare...
which makes me blush and smile back..
=)

on the other hand, Man Utd defeated arsenal...
in a 4-0 win....
Even though fergie sat out ronaldo, giggs and tevez...
Interesting....

**
im addicted to you
yes i am
oh i surely am

Love**

2008-02-15T09:32:00.000-08:00

I had a beautiful night..
i swear..
and i have only you to thank..
coz im still smiling =)
enaf said..

**
the beach looks exta beautiful dun u think?
uve found the way to make me shut my mouth
and den, there were fireworks

TheNotebook**

2008-02-09T07:55:00.000-08:00

My heart leapt with joy when i browsed through my scv guide and found out that The Notebook was airing at 7.15pm that day. yes, that Nicholas Sparks story.

I bathed late. To be fresh at 7.15. I put on perfume. My Victoria Secret perfume. Sumhow, i have to look and smell good for Noah Calhoun. I think i was Allie Hamilton in my previous life. Reincarnation, juz like she said. U might think im crazy, yes i am. For The Notebook.

The Notebook, my favourite novel and my favourite movie hands down. I may came across better movie or novels in my life but this will be the favourite. I still remember the first time i watch/read it. It took my breath away. It really does. No matter how many times i read/watch it, i had to wipe away that tear at the corner of my eyes at the end of it.

It still awed by how beautifully the book was written. It describes everything in detail. The colour of the sky, the beautiful swans at the lake and how love is growing. It brings u there. And when u watch the movie after reading it, you felt as if you had visited that place, when reading it. Thats how beautiful The Notebook is.

That story made me believe in true love. It made me believe that no matter who u meet in your life, there is definitely the right person waiting. And no matter how long it takes, you will come back to the right one. You definitely will. =)

**
will you be my noah calhoun?

2008-02-07T08:51:00.000-08:00

Fell in love with this song the first time i heard it.. =)

pertama kali ku melihat wajahmu
ku berhenti
mencari nafasku

tapi hati ini telah pun membeku
ku tak pasti
engkau mengambil tempatnya di hatiku

ku memberikan doa
kepada yg esa
engkaulah orangnya

kasih
engkaulah bintang di dlm hatiku
senyumanmu menjadi sinaranku
kehadiranmu ialah kekuatanku
kau bawaku ke pelangi
menjejak awan nan kasapuri

tak sangka engkau telah pun ku jumpa
yang ku cari
untuk selama ini

kau memberikanku kepercayaan
melafazkan semuanya yang telah aku simpan

ku memberikan doa
kepada yg esa
engkaulah orangnya

kasih
engkaulah bintang di dlm hatiku
senyumanmu menjadi sinaranku
kehadiranmu ialah kekuatanku
kau bawaku ke pelangi
menjejak awan nan kasapuri

ku bersyukur kepada Illahi
menemukanku denganmu kasih
hatiku ini hanya untukmu
oh kasih

ku memberikan doa
kepada yg esa
engkaulah orangnya

kasih
engkaulah bintang di dalam hatiku
senyumanmu menjadi sinaranku
kehadiranmu ialah kekuatanku
kau bawaku ke pelangi
menjejak awan nan kasapuri

**
oh its so true =)

SumtgBeginsWhen AnotherEnds**

2008-02-05T01:50:00.000-08:00

it has always been this way...
when a chapter ends, another will open up..
its scary but i guess thats the risk u hafta take..
u have a choice but choosing is as risky..
and u nv noe wad befall till ure in it...

sumwhr in ur life, u meet people..
people that u hafta sumhow let go at a point of time..
sad, but it happens..
not to blame life but this is juz hw it is..
roller coaster ride in every corner u turn to...

but it does make u grow up..
even when u dun think its the right time..
u will learn, no matter how late it is..
u will learn to make the right choices..
u will learn whats right for u..
u will learn to let go..
u will learn how to be a human being..
n wen u do, its not so scary after all

**
sumhow, i noe ur promises are nt empty
u said, lets prove that "nothing last forever" is wrong
vey wrong
=)

Sparks**

2008-02-02T08:30:00.000-08:00

dearest friend,
i noe i may nt be der with u 24/7
n im sorry for all the times ive nt been der
bt u do noe im always here for u
u do noe we are always here for u
and no matter how bad u think uve fallen
juz noe dat u will always be strong enuf to stand back again
wad uve gone thru, i dun noe if i can still smile like u do
i love u for who you are babe
we love u for who you are
i miss our hugging session heh =)

february is here again..
the month of love...
its supposed to be the month im looking foward to..
and wen d day comes, i noe ill have a hard time
but on the other hand, i noe dat time cant be turned back
no matter how hard i try..
ill go thru dat day
i hafta...

so wads in store for me n d rest of my frens
(u noe who you are)
guess we juz hafta wait and see
=)

**
everytime i turn around
u will always be there
u took my hand in yours
n let me noe that
everythings gonna be ok
n i believe you
each and every single time

with u,
i felt i could be in d darkest room
or fall from the highest cliff
or swim in d deepest ocean
and i still dun feel afraid

Beautiful Friendship**

2008-01-30T09:15:00.000-08:00

** now now people, do u get wad i mean when we say u will only get beautiful pictures when friendsip are formed n when u start being urself? proven =)

ABigFatJoke

2008-01-30T00:11:00.000-08:00

and i found a reason to move on.. finally

as bitchy as i may sound, it wasnt that hard after all

u just hafta make that move and here i am *evil grin*

and for those out there who had been very judgemental, guess wadd?

i dun care animore!

its not as if u give me food to survive

its not as if u send me home everyday

its not as if u make me smile everytime i see u

its not as if u call me every other night to wish me a gd nite sleep

i now now hw to differentiate people

i do ok...

i juz haf sumtg to say here

u shld count ur lucky star im nt gonna blog abt it

or even be sarcastic as i usually am

as sumone very dear to me advised me against doing so

i have many things to say

i have many unbelievable things to say

i laughed at u everytime i think abt it

i became more grateful to be with the person im with now

oh how funny...

and now, im laughing my way to the dustbin as i throw away our memories coz i need space for new ones...

**Now i dun understand what im going thru

there must be a plan that leads me to you

because the hurt just disappears

in every moment that ure near

just like an answered prayer

you make the loneliness easy to bear

you really noe where to start

fixing a broken heart

you really noe wad to do

your emotional tools

can cure any fool

whose dreams have fallen apart

fixing a broken heart

soon the rain will stop falling baby

and ill forget the past

cause here we are at last

a new life

2008-01-24T00:10:00.001-08:00

a new blog..
a step to a new life i hope..
here i am trying hard to break away from the past..
its hard to go thru what i went thru..

but i have friends who makes sure i stay sane..
i have them to make sure i dun fall as hard as i thought i will..
i have them to remind me that they need my smile..
i cant thank them enuf for being there..
u guys know who you guys are..
and with u guys, we noe we wil only get beautiful pictures..
right?.. =)

i thought you would bring me to great heights...
u did, but as soon as we reached the top, u dropped me off..
just like that..
u came down, as always..
saying that ure sorry and wanted to go up again...
without even realising that i had broken bones and blood all over..
and now, im afraid of heights..

*and when we dance in the rain, i smiled till the sun shines..and it stays =)